A MOTHER HAD STATED THAT HER DAUGHTER REJECTED HER TO COME TO HER GRADUATION

A mother had shared her story on Reddit, as her daughter stated that she wanted her estranged father to come to her graduation, and he would come in only one condition, and its that her mother wouldn’t be there. So she had stated, it is either her mother, or her father.
She had started her story on Reddit as, “I (40sF) have a daughter (18F) who I’ll call B. When she was younger, her father (broke up before she was born) was very involved in her life and she was admittedly a “dad’s girl” but this all changed when she turned 8 and he got married. He barely called and just abandoned her for his new family. This was obviously hard on her and she rebelled a lot. But she went to therapy and seemed good.”
Then explained that her father sometimes calls her daughter and becomes a ghost again for the rest of the year, and how good their relationship with her daughter. “B has not seen him since she was 12 and he speaks to her maybe 3 times a year maximum. When he calls, she believes he is now back in her life for good then he ghosts her for the remainder of the year. This being said ,B and I have a great relationship, we do everything together. She even refers to me as her best friend so I’d say we have a good relationship.”
As her graduation came closer, she had stated to her mother that she had talked with her father, and he would come to her graduation if her mother wouldn’t be there. “Recently was her graduation and I was excited. But then she came to me a week before and told me she is going to invite her dad and his son. And cos her dad doesn’t want to see me, I can’t come. B told me that was the only way he was gonna go. I angrily told her, I felt betrayed and wont forgive her for this. She just told me I have been there for many of her milestones and she wants her father to experience some too. Things got heated and we argued.”
Then she had talked with her daughter again, and left the house crying, went to her sister. “The night before her graduation, I pleaded with her but she ignored me when I spoke. And only said “I’m sorry but I’m not changing my mind. I left and cried until my sister offered to take me out during the graduation to take my mind of it and I agreed.”
Then, on the day of her graduation, her father had left her again, as she wanted her mother to come, as she shared, “I woke up the next morning to my daughter bawling her eyes out. I looked at the time and realized the ceremony starts in 5 minutes. I asked B why she hasn’t left yet. B then tells me her father ditched her and isn’t answering anymore. I hug her and tell her to make the most of her graduation. She looked shocked and asks if I’m not going to the ceremony now her father isn’t anymore . And how it’ll be embarrassing to be the only one there without parents. I told I’m sorry that I already had plans. She then screamed and called me a bad mom. I apologies once again and got ready to meet my sister.”
Then she stated that she wanted to teach her a lesson that every action has their consequences, but started to feel bad later. “I chose not to go because I felt betrayed and wanted to teach her actions have consequences, even if it broke me that i didn’t go. Since B returned she hasn’t spoken a word to me. And she looks depressed and like she’s been crying for ages. I’m starting to regret not going.”
Then she concluded her story and asked for advice from other Redditors as, “My sister says I did the right thing, but one of the moms at my daughter school said she was depressed at graduation and now I feel bad that I ruined what was suppose to be a day to remember because I wanted to teach my daughter a lesson.”
Here are the advices given to troubled mother from the Redditors.
“You gave her an important lesson about maintaining relationships with the people who are there for you and not blowing them off for the next new thing that comes along.”
“The real AH here is the father. He forced his daughter’s hand by giving her an ultimatum. He used his daughter to hurt his ex and then took off. The daughter is technically an adult, but she’s still his child.”
“She should’ve never uninvited you in the first place. She knows her dad is unreliable. She’s an adult. Y’all always tell the 18 year old’s that come on here with their parent issues to just move out because they’re adults, but when an 18 year old completely destroys their parent’s feelings to appease someone else, they can’t be an AH because they’re only 18. Y’all really pick and choose”
What do you think? Let us know.