A MOTHER FROM UK HAD SPENT MORE THAN 40 YEARS TO CARE FOR HER DISABLED SON, AND HER STATEMENTS CREATED A DEBATE

Gillian and Roy Relf, are from Kent, England, after they had married when they were 19 and 20, they had received their son, Andrew.

Not long after from their first child, they had welcomed their second child. But as she was pregnant, she had a feeling that there was something wrong with the baby she is carrying.
When she was 22, she had gave birth to her son with Down Syndrome, Stephen, at the Canterbury Hospital in Kent, in 1967.

For seven months, they had received no information from their doctors, but her mother had said that her grandson has Down Syndrome.
When he became sick one day, and needed to go to the hospital, it was then they had heard from a doctor that their son has Down Syndrome.

“While I do love my son and am fiercely protective of him.” She had said about her son.
But, she is unsure that if their lives would be simpler, if Stephen was never born, as she said, “I do wish I’d had an abortion,”

When she was interviewed by, Loose Wome, in 2014, she had made comments about their condition of raising a boy with Down Syndrome, “My son can’t talk. He has to use sign language. Nobody can understand what he’s saying. Having a Downs child has had an extensive impact on our life. We’ve not been able to go and do an awful lot of things, we’ve missed family parties.” She said.
It was painful for her to see her son failing in everything, as other children were accomplishing.

Stephen had learned to walk when he was five, and there was only one way to communicate with him, sign language.
If he ever becomes sick, there were no way of him telling the problem, and his mother needs to figüre it out herself. She once stated that she had a breakdown in the hospital, as her son needed medical treatment.
She also aware of the comments she made may have bad influence on some other people, but she had stated that the things she went through as a parent to a disabled son, it is important for her to talk about.

“I’d challenge any one of them to walk a mile in the shoes of mothers like me, saddled for life as I am, with a needy, difficult, exasperating child who will never grow up, before they judge us.” She said.
One time, Stephen had an medical situation, where he didn’t stop crying as he was carried to the hospital, which later understood that he was suffering from hemolytic anemia. Doctors had stated that his spleen needed a removal, and if not, he would lose his life. For five weeks, they needed to stay in Great Ormond Street Hospital, as he was recovering from the surgery.

At his 11th age, he had lived with his family for 18 full months, and his mother had stated that, “They were the longest 18 months of our lives.”
She stated that taking care of her disabled son had left her no time for herself, she was even barely leaving the house.
She also stated that she was afraid for her sons health too, since when he was 18, he was attacked by a care giver in a facility he was in.
As she was aware that many people would offended by her sayings, she had stated that if she had a time machine, she wouldn’t even think about abortion, as she said in their golden anniversary.
“I’m now 69, and Roy is 70, and we’ll celebrate our golden wedding anniversary next month.” She said.
“The reason I said that I would have had an abortion [is] because I wouldn’t want a child to suffer the problems Stephen had suffered.” She explained herself.
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